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TV Smith's Dua Sen. The politically incorrect irregular columnist combines
his idiosyncratic observations and tangential commentary into a blog...
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KISS
& FELL
by
TV Smith
15/04/04
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I'm
pissed with the The
Sun. Barely 24 hours after our local
dailies anointed a Bolehan cheerleader
to grace its front pages; the British tabloid
cruelly snatched national pride from our frail
little hearts. Never mind that she's no longer
our fellow citizen. We take pride in knowing
that Malaysia finally produced a global celebrity
who is more newsworthy
than Hong Kong-born William
Hung.
Local born model, Sarah Marbeck accomplished
in one night what millions of women worldwide
spend a lifetime dreaming of doing for free.
She bonked David Beckham. And grudgingly,
I must add that Singaporeans should feel self-important
too. The celebrated one-night-stand took place
in the land of the original SPGs. |
So why was I elated? After years of getting a bad
rap on the world stage, Malaysia deserves a much-needed
break. Terrorist tourists and nuclear spare parts
dealers attracted to our "Malaysia
My Second Home" program may have shifted
the limelight here, but they somehow do not qualify.
They never studied in Assunta Girls School, Petaling
Jaya.
Not that there were no previous homegrown patriots
seeking fame and fortune abroad. We do make the
occasional headlines when our stewardesses go on
shoplifting sprees. At most, our syndicates get
busted for credit card cloning or for running prostitution
rings. Nothing to shout about, even though we may
have Malaysian-born drug smugglers, pimps and bookies
incarcerated in every capital city around the world.
Like Ms Posh, I was truly apprehensive when I first
read the startling revelations. Not only that; I
was even suspicious of her roots. Then, I read reports
that Ms Marbeck was SMS-ing the living daylights
out of Mr Beckham after the brief liaison. That
confirmed it for me. No woman, unless she's Malaysian,
can harass a man so incessantly via text messaging.
And now, just as we are about to celebrate with
fireworks over Jalan P Ramlee and confer her a datukship,
something unfortunate cropped up. The Sun has gone
to town with fresh allegations that she previously
worked at the posh and award-winning Australian
brothel, The
Boardroom of Melbourne. I am hopeful that
she worked there only as a receptionist and not
as reported. She kissed and she fell.
©
2004 TV SMITH
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