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TV Smith's Dua Sen. The politically incorrect irregular columnist combines
his idiosyncratic observations and tangential commentary into a blog...
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MENAGE
A MOI
by TV Smith
14/11/03
Oops!
She did it again. Britney Spears just learned
a new trick. The disappearing finger trick. Her
song "Touch Of My Hand" (from
the new In The Zone album) is about, eh…
er… touching herself. Don't get me wrong.
As a committed and responsible bachelor, I'm all
for loving oneself. Problem is, the pop tartlet
does not really know her own market. She's hitting
the spot, I mean spotlight, again and ignoring
the fact that most of her fans are little girls
of ages between nine and twelve. It's unhip to
listen to Britney once armpit and other body hair
start sprouting, apparently. Go over to Bangsar
and mention her name to any of the navel-pierced
teenage girls and you will likely get your shoes
puked on.
Please do not copy! Link
instead, to this article at: http://www.tvsmith.net.my/duasen/141103_menage.html
Maybe Spears just realised real men don't do silicon.
Or maybe she is still heart broken and likes strumming
her pains with her fingers. With the revelations,
she might end up rubbing our hypersensitive authorities
the wrong way. Will they give her the (two) finger
salute, literally and figuratively, when the new
album is released next Monday?
Please do not copy! Link
instead, to this article at: http://www.tvsmith.net.my/duasen/141103_menage.html
On the other hand (another pun intended), the
tradition of dunking the doughnut ought to be
encouraged in this country. Among the adult male
population, at least. It should stem the alarming
rise in rape and incest cases. We need to get
a grip on ourselves. Don't believe it when someone
tells you your worst enemy is yourself. Your best
lover is yourself. Making love to yourself is
the safest of all safe sex, me thinks.
Please do not copy! Link
instead, to this article at: http://www.tvsmith.net.my/duasen/141103_menage.html
Since
the government is so fond of kempen(s),
it should make next year; "Tahun Cinta
I". However, taxes on soaps and lotions
should be abolished if we wish to promote mass
spermicide seriously. The recent reduction in
broadband access charges is already a step in
the right direction. The introduction of the internet
has shifted the activity from the bathroom to
the bedroom (monitor). The loss in taxes and revenue
could be negated by the likely increase in sales
of self-winding (kinetic) watches, wrist wraps
and spectacles. In conjunction with the launch,
local TV stations should also screen "Spanking
the Monkey", the iconic 1994 movie centered
on personal habits.
Please do not copy! Link
instead, to this article at: http://www.tvsmith.net.my/duasen/141103_menage.html
Moral
of the story? It's cheaper and less stressful
cheating on your other hand. Ask Britney.
©
2003 TV SMITH
Link to this article: http://www.tvsmith.net.my/duasen/141103_menage.html
See
also: SEX PLEASE,
WE'RE MALAYSIANS | PEEPING
TANS
Link
to TV Smith's Dua Sen: http://www.tvsmith.net.my/duasen/
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