TV SMITH's Dua Sen: Tools Of The Trade
TV Smith's Dua Sen
TV Smith's Dua Sen. The politically incorrect irregular columnist combines his idiosyncratic observations and tangential commentary into a blog...

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TOOLS OF THE TRADE
by TV Smith
28/10/04
do not copy. Link to this article instead: http://www.tvsmith.net.my/duasen/271004_bomoh.html
271004_bomoh.html
My friend Janet is in a predicament. She wants to go to a Halloween party this Friday dressed as a hooker but her friends objected strongly. "You are suppose to dress up as someone ELSE!", they chided her. Poor Janet. It's all in the bag, actually…

Budget Bangs:
Hangouts: Side lanes of Chow Kit, Tiong Nam, Jalan Raja Muda, Jalan Imbi.
Plastic bag contains: Packets of kuaci, KY lubricant, disinfectant, fly swatter.

Street-Walkers:
Hangouts: Sidewalks of Jalan Bukit Bintang, Jalan Sultan Ismail.
Micro handbag contains: Torchlight, Swiss Army Knife, Rumah Tumpangan directory.

Cross-Dressers:
Hangouts: Back lanes of Chow Kit, Jalan Tuanku Abdul Rahman, Dataran Merdeka.
Sling bag contains: Mouth wash, menthol sweets, electric shaver.

Extra-Service Masseurs:
Hangouts: Spas & health centers of Chinatown, Subang, Jalan Ampang, Puchong, BB.
Pouch contains: Baby lotion, alarm clock, catalog of direct-selling products.

Foraging Freelancers:
Hangouts: Major nightspots of KL, gyms, coffee places.
Handbag contains: BC pills, condoms, emergency numbers.

Transit Workers:
Hangouts: Backpacker inns and internet cafes in Chinatown, Brickfields.
Backpack contains: Guide book, maps, transferable client contact list.

Mainlanders:
Hangouts: GRO lounges in BB, DU, Cheras, Puchong, Kepong, Pandan.
Haversack contains: College ID, oil blotting tissues, Mandarin-Malay dictionary.

Rent-A-Date:
Hangouts: Escort agencies in the Golden Triangle area.
Handbag contains: Fine dining guide, stopwatch, receipt book.

Deliverables:
Hangouts: Own homes, shopping malls, hotel lobbies, pimp's pad, taxi terminals.
Handbag contains: 3 handphones, call cards, commission tracking of all bellhops in KL/PJ.

Tourist Trappers:
Hangouts: Bars along Jalan P Ramlee, Bangsar, Asian Heritage Row, Hartamas, Cangkat BB.
Haversack contains: Calculator for exchange rates, change in all major currencies, map of KL.

Import Players:
Hangouts: Hotels in Jalan Sultan Ismail, Chinatown, Bukit Bintang.
Branded handbag contains: Passport, student visa, Russian-English dictionary.

High-Enders:
Hangouts: Condos in Damansara, Kenny Hills, Jalan U-Thant.
Designer bag contains: Wireless credit card terminal, modeling portfolio, PDA with CRM software.


Additional reading: World Sex Guide - Kuala Lumpur (adult content)

© 2004 TV SMITH
Link to this article: http://www.tvsmith.net.my/duasen/281004_prostitutes.html

See also: SEX PLEASE, WE'RE MALAYSIANS | KNOW YOUR BOMOH

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